Some of my favorite things are exports of Italy – pizza, Lamborghinis, high-end fashion, supermodels that wear the high-end fashion, the Italian Chandelier, Vespas, Rome (the television series and the actual city), firearms, wine, food processing gear. The list goes on.
I can now add Porta-Johns to the list. I had no idea I was sitting in an Italian human garbage collector until I looked up while attempting to fight off the swarm of flies with my free hand and there it read: “MADE IN ITALY”
Interestingly enough, I had recently heard that one of the Italian bases on the other side of the country happens to not only have Italian porta-johns, but eternal flowing rivers of alcohol and - not just one - but 4 pizzerias! A pity, that the only Italian product we have here is a shitter. Don't get me wrong, it's a nice one. It's firm, it has a great post-modern design and it's generally kept clean. It even has one of the best locking mechanisms around to prevent the overzealous soldier (or more often than not - Chow hall victim) from finding you in the most vulnerable of positions.
But I'd trade all that in a hot second for a few cold brews and a genuine slice of Italian pizza.
Arrivederci!
-Danny
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